Have you noticed my silence as of late? Yeah…me too…
Remember that adorable scene in Disney’s Bambi (not a pun of any means) where Thumper shyly recites:
If you can’t say somethin’ nice….don’t say nothin’ at all…
Yeah, that’s about where I am right now. One could say shit hit a fan, things got real, or scripts got flipped. I wouldn’t say that, though. I would say that people had thoughts and feelings about me, my life, and my words. They then told me about how who I am bothered them, how my life disappointed them, and how my words betrayed them.
I have been sad, furious, disappointed, and hurt: sad that I thought I could use this place to connect with the people in my life that I don’t normally, furious that the reasons that have kept me from connecting still apply, disappointed my words have been twisted into meanings I did not give them, and hurt that those I should trust most I trust least.
Having been the sister of a brother who was goaded into arguments, real and dumb alike, time and time again (yes, we seriously fought over which was Bert and which was Ernie), I will not take the bait. But until such time as I can open my mouth (or place fingers to keys) without somethin’ not nice falling out accidentally…I’m sayin’ nuthin’.
In the meantime I encourage revisiting my Golden Rules.
To the friends I met here without ever expecting to that keep me from shutting down because I truly enjoy meeting here to comment and share our lives bloggeratedly – THANK YOU! I MISS YOU!!