My7DayDiet: Day 9; The Impact

Yeah…I’m still writing about it…

You may remember that some time around Day 3 I was craving a Twix bar so bad I was dreaming about it. I spent hours researching shortbread cookie recipes so I could try to better imagine how it would taste. I was thinking about the chewy caramel and how perfectly it went with the chocolate. Perfection in a bite-sized chocolate coated cookie.

Something went terribly, terribly wrong between Day 3 and Day 8. Yesterday was Day 8 and no Twix bars were to be had. No joke. In fact, no junk has been eaten. That’s not even the worst of it…

On Day 7, the last day, I started thinking about what I was going to eat on Day 8. My *first* day without a plan, without a strategy. I was going to be on my own again and I was nervous. I was nervous because I didn’t want to screw it up. I was having a hard time remembering what it was I ate before.

I was meandering through Whole Foods picking up some flaxseed meal for baking I was planning to do and because Cara promised it doesn’t taste like fish and happened upon some Veggie Rolls wrapped in Brown Rice over by the seafood section. Yay for lunch. I got home and made a loaf of oat bread because I love it and then I remembered how much I love my cold oats for a fantastically easy breakfast so I made some up and let them wait in the fridge for the day to come.

Then the day did come and as I waited for the girls to potty outside I sliced some fresh bread put a little grape jam on it and snacked while assessing my food day. Slice o’ bread for breakfast. Bowl o’ cold oats and bananas in hemp milk for snack once I got to work. Rice wrapped avocado and cucumber for lunch. And then my upper lip curled in disgust.

That’s a lot of refined carbohydrates, Meg.

Garsh, I know! Is that what my food day normally looks like?

Well, carbs are good and necessary. They are all low glycemic carbs and those are not *unhealthy* food choices. It is clean.

But during the detox, I got my carbs naturally from fruit. I don’t need all that. In fact, I know that I don’t need any of it because I feel fantastic without it.

This was exactly the conversation that myself and I had by the light of the refrigerator door. I took out my lunch bag and unpacked it. All I took to work was a tupperware container of spaghetti squash and a hardboiled egg. On the commute in I stopped off to grab a massive serving of cut fruit (it is so much more cost-effective to cut that stuff myself) and fresh salsa. In the end my food day consisted of: Slice o bread and grape jam for breakfast. Cantaloupe for until it was finished. Salsa, spaghetti squash, and a hardboiled egg for the rest with left over for tomorrow.


Remember how much I was looking forward to a cup of deliciously bold, warm coffee? I hadn’t had coffee in 9 days and in no way have I felt like I need it. Heck, it was the week of the detox of all weeks that the girls and I finally started getting up at the 4:30am alarm to go out and do our 4 miles. Day 8 was a beloved day for I was going to have coffee. Except that apparently, I’ve been romanticizing the taste of coffee and it does not taste the way I dreamed it tasted (I have the same problem with curry, I keep thinking I’ll like it but then I eat it and it lets me down) and a few sips in and my ears were ringing, I tried to have conversations with coworkers but I felt like I was on speed, and my face was flushed.

Well, hell.


Remember the reason I wanted to do the detox was because I found out I had food allergies, not life threatening, and I’d gotten lazy around the holidays and was just eating what was easy?

Remember the reason I found out I had food allergies was because I’ve had constant joint pain for the past 2-3 years and migraines for the past 10 and after tons and tons of testing nothing was wrong with me until we found out that I’m allergic to everything I eat? While I haven’t been soy-free, I’ve been very soy aware. I’m not avoiding it in all it’s annoying preservative forms but I will stay away from anything with soybean oil and anything obviously soyful.

  • I’ve noticed a dramatic decrease in my migraines during this time.
  • Glands of mine that have been swollen and infected since I was about 10 years old, are finally not swollen. I’m not kidding, either. Since middle school about every 6 months I’d come down with some terrible throat problem and have to live off pudding and jello for 2 weeks. I’d get swabbed for strep (negative) and mono (negative), told I had tonsilitis, given antibiotics and sent home. This was the cycle of my life until a few years ago when I had my tonsils and adenoids removed. I no longer had the flare ups keeping me home on antibiotics but still my glands were chronically swollen and constantly sore. But now, I poke and I prod and nothing…no pain, no swelling, no soreness. Nada.

But the thing I’ve noticed as a result of the detox…

  • My joint pain is gone and it’s been below freezing all week. This may not seem big to some but it is huge. For the past few years when it is cold outside or I’m having a particularly poor blood circulation day resulting in cold hands and fingers, I have been plagued with pain in my elbows, wrists, and fingers. Last year, though, the cold seeped into my hips and I was kept home in horrific pain. Sleeping was awful because unless I was on my back, a searing pain would shoot through my body from the hip-joint I was laying on and keep me awake. Seriously, it was awful.


And that is how My7DayDiet ruined my life because

that twix bar just isn’t worth it.

My7DayDiet: Day 8

It is finished. I made it. I did pretty good and I feel really great.

I’m glad that I did this. Throughout the week there’ve been a few people poking at me and giving me a hard time for doing what they see as a fad diet. I don’t see it that way. I’ve been increasingly frustrated at my inability to eat conveniently or the foods that I really love (read: beans, all of them). When I came down with the stomach bug I didn’t go to the grocery store for nearly 2 weeks and when I finally felt a little bit better I didn’t want to think about it or work it out so I gave a big “Up yours” to my dietary restraints decided I’d rather deal with the migraines and stomach pains and ate what I wanted. I became almost immediately more sluggish and lazy with low affect. This is the cycle of Megan: 90% obsessing over the tiniest detail, 10% “whatever, man.”

It never lasts long anymore these moments of total surrender because I know better. I know how it makes me feel. I know how I want to feel. Aaaaand, I know how to make it better.

I wasn’t looking for a quick fix. A diet. There isn’t some dress that I was too heifferous to zip up a week ago but now, by jove, it fits perfectly. I needed to clean my body from the assault of soy that lives in everything, barley from falling face first into sandwich trays, and the other chemical names littering ingredient lists found on cardboard boxes that don’t sound all that nutritious. I just wanted to clean myself up. It’s a new year. I’ve got things to do. And so I have done: I’m detoxed.

Someone said to me today, “You can’t fix your problems with a fad diet. You need to change your lifestyle.” Well, thank you Mr. McDonald’s favorite customer for your profound words of insight. I know this, I’ve done this, I had a bad few weeks, now shut up and eat your burger and fries.

Here’s the recap…

Day 1: Fruit

Natural way to normalize the body. Intended to help prepare the body for the upcoming days. Fruits are low in calorie and fat free and also quickly digesting so this day helps flush your system and enhance the detox process.

Remember to eat as much as you want. Start with melon which will fill you up. Abandon your eating schedule like I forgot to. If you don’t keep your stomach well fed, you will feel hungry. Berries are great to keep with you to snack.

Day 2: Vegetables

Start the day with a baked potato. Since the fruits from the previous day are likely digested, a potato ensures you have the energy you need to start the day.  The fiber activates your system for the detox while the vitamin and mineral rich foods give you much needed nutrients.

Super filling vegetables like broccoli and kale will help keep you feeling full. Salad with a kale base is a great option. Keep carrots and celery handy to snack on as you go through your day.

Day 3: Fruits and Vegetables

Combining the fast digesting fruits and the fiberous and nutrious vegetables. Your body is getting completely natural nutrition; no refined carbohydrates, saturated fats, or artificial flavors.

Same as before, just make sure you stay well fed. Find the snacks that work for you. Eat as much as you want. Try not to let yourself get hungry or you will hurt someone rushing to a delicious pastry puff in the lunchroom.

Day 4: Bananas and Milk

This day makes up for reduced calcium and potassium in your system from the first few days. The bananas are also great for you energy by way of carbohydrates and continued fiber to help with digestion. You can have up to 8 bananas and 3 glasses of fat-free milk.

My favoritest day of the week. Make a milkshake, frozen smoothie, or icecream. When you feel like you are cheating you can saucily look at your friends eating carrot sticks and brag that it’s all milkshakes, all day for you! I’d have one and when I just started feeling hungry again, made another.

Day 5: Protein and Tomatoes

Today makes up for reduced protein in your diet and tomatoes are great for fiber, lycopene, and helping flush out the system.

Protein never tasted so good! Try not to cheat with ketchup and actually eat a tomato. I’m a sissy. I make no bones about it. I did what I had to do to get through the day.

Day 6: Protein and Vegetables

Similar to day 5 but eat as many vegetables as possible. You should start feeling the effects of the week today.

I did feel the effects today. Coffee-free for 7 days and there was pep-in-my-step by 5am. This day food-wise should be easy enough to figure out. Remember though, stay full.  

Day 7: Fruit, Vegetables, and Juice

Start the day out with fruit as you may be feeling week from a lack of carbohydrates over the past 2 days. The aim is the same as Day 3, combining  the power of fruits and vegetables. Today you can enjoy the additional benefits of nutrient rich vegetable juice in a highly concentrated form.

I made it! My mindset has thankfully shifted back to what I consider normal. I’m excited to restock the house with good eats and try out some new recipes. I feel recommitted to clean eating again. With a few bumps, the week has been free of processed food and I was satisfied and I feel good.

So there you have it…My7DayDiet. It’s not mine. I didn’t make it. I’m not a doctor, nutritionist, dietician, or even all that great in the kitchen.

I’m just a girl with a blog who’s kinda groovy, too.